My toddler isn't talking much yet. What now?

What is a late talker?

A late talker is a toddler who is saying fewer words than you'd expect for their age, but who seems to be getting along in other ways. They understand you, they play, they point, they look at you when something funny happens. They just aren't using many words yet.¹

It's a descriptive label, not a diagnosis. Some late talkers catch up without any help, and some turn out to have a language difficulty that needs support.¹ At the start, nobody can reliably tell which is which by looking at a calendar, and that's the whole reason this question is so stressful.²

What are most children doing at 18 months, 2 and 3?

Children differ a lot, so please read these as rough pictures and not a test.³ They're the same lists I use in the checker on the questions page.

Around 18 months, many children:

• use around ten words, or more
• point at something to show you, not only to get it
• follow a simple instruction without a gesture to help
• copy words you say, or have a go at them
• know the names of familiar things around the house

Around two, many children:

• put two words together, like "more juice" or "daddy gone"
• use fifty words, or more
• understand far more than they can say
• are understood about half the time by people who know them well
• ask for things by name, rather than pointing or crying

Around three, many children:

• talk in sentences of three or four words
• ask lots of questions: what, where, who
• are understood by familiar adults most of the time
• can tell you something simple that happened earlier
• play alongside other children, and talk while doing it

Ticking fewer of these doesn't mean anything is wrong. I can't see your child from here, and children really do differ. But a gap is worth noticing, and worth a conversation if it doesn't shift.

Should I wait and see?

You've probably been told to. Relatives say it, and sometimes health professionals do too. I understand why, because plenty of toddlers do start talking in a rush.

My view is that waiting and watching are different things. Waiting means putting it out of your mind until the next birthday. Watching means noticing what your child understands, how they let you know what they want, and whether new words are arriving, even slowly. You can do the second while you also ask for advice. There's good evidence that support helps young children with language difficulties, including approaches that coach parents to use strategies at home,⁴ and asking costs you very little.

It's worth asking sooner, rather than later, if your child doesn't seem to understand what you say, has stopped using words they had, doesn't try to communicate in any way (pointing, reaching, pulling you to something), or you simply have a feeling that something isn't right. Trust that feeling, because parents are usually the first to notice.

What can I do at home?

You don't need flashcards. Most of what helps a late talker is ordinary and fits into the day, though it's easy to rush it.

Get down to their level and follow what they're interested in. If they're holding a lorry, talk about the lorry. Say a little more than they do: if they say "lorry", you say "big lorry" or "lorry go". Leave a few seconds of quiet after you speak, because some children need that time to find a response. Read the same book over and over, since repetition is how words stick. Name things as you do them at the shops or in the bath.⁵

And try not to quiz. "What's this? What colour is it?" turns play into an exam, and children can feel it. Comments often land better than questions. That's a rule of thumb from clinical practice more than a hard research finding.

If your child uses gestures, a few signs or pictures, that counts. Every way of communicating counts. It gives them a way to be understood now, which often makes talking feel worth the effort.

Is it something I did?

I hear this a lot, usually near the end of a first conversation. Almost certainly not. Screens, dummies, being the second child, or working full-time are all things parents blame themselves for, and I don't think the worry helps anyone. Children are late to talk for lots of reasons, many of which nobody can point to. In a large Australian study, late talking at 24 months was not linked to parents' education or income, mental health, parenting practices or family functioning; it was linked to family history, being a boy and early neurobiological growth.⁶ Some everyday habits are still worth adjusting, because the NHS advises limiting TV time and only offering a dummy at sleep times,⁵ but that's about giving talking more room, not about blame. What helps is how the grown-ups around them respond from here, and you are already doing that by reading this.

It's also fine if some days you don't feel up to a playful chat about lorries. Little and often is plenty.

What if we speak more than one language at home?

Keep speaking it. Growing up with two languages is not a reason for late talking, and the RCSLT says parents should never be advised to drop their home language.⁷ I've written a separate guide on bilingual children and talking.

What happens if I get in touch?

Start with the free 15-minute call. We talk about what you've noticed and I tell you honestly whether I think a session would help. If it would, the first step is an assessment, which is mostly play. The guide to the assessment explains what that looks like, and the fees page lists the costs. You can read more about how I support language delay and communication too.

I see children from 18 months at the clinic in Wanstead, and I can visit your child's nursery. Whatever you decide, I hope you leave the call knowing a little more than when you started.