Bilingual children and talking

Does speaking two languages cause a speech delay?

No. Growing up with more than one language does not cause speech and language difficulties.¹² It is a stubborn myth, and a harmful one. If something is not right, the languages are not the reason.

I say this first because the opposite advice is still handed out, sometimes by people with good intentions: nursery staff, relatives, other parents, occasionally professionals. If you've been told your child's talking would improve if you dropped the home language, I'd ask you to hold off.

Should I stop speaking our home language?

No, and nobody should be telling you to. The RCSLT's guidance is that parents should never be advised to abandon their home language in favour of English.¹ Your home language is how you're most yourself with your child. It's how you sing, joke, tell off and comfort. It also connects them to grandparents, cousins and everyone who matters to your family, and that's worth far more than a cleaner-sounding English sentence at age three.

If anything, switching to a language you're less sure of can make talking with your child stiffer and sparser, and rich, relaxed conversation is exactly what helps language grow. Speak the language you feel most natural in.

What does typical bilingual talking look like?

It's different from single-language talking, but that doesn't mean delayed.² You may notice:

• words from both languages in the same sentence
• a bigger vocabulary in one language than the other, or in one setting than the other
• the stronger language changing over time, often as nursery or school begins
• a child who goes quiet for a while in a new language, then starts using it

Mixing languages isn't confusion.³ Children reach for whichever word they have, much as adults do. A child might know "water" in your home language and "bin" in English because those are the words they've heard in those places. Added up across both languages, a young bilingual child's vocabulary is often similar in size to a single-language child's, even if it looks smaller in either language on its own.⁴

That last point matters if anyone is measuring only the English. A child's English can look thin on paper when they have plenty of language in total.

When is it worth asking for advice?

The same things worry me in a bilingual child as in any other child. The question is whether the child is struggling across all their languages, not whether one lags behind.¹

Pay attention if your child:

• seems to find talking hard in every language they use
• doesn't seem to understand what you say to them in your home language
• isn't pointing, showing you things or trying to communicate
• has very few words overall, from either language, around the ages where other children are using plenty
• is hard to understand even for family, in the language you speak most

Ask someone who knows your family language, such as a grandparent or an older cousin, how they hear your child. Their view helps, because they can tell you whether the difficulty shows up at home, not just at nursery.

The age-by-age lists in the late talkers guide were written with single-language children in mind, so use them as a rough picture only, and count words from both languages together.

What does an assessment look like for a bilingual child?

I watch your child play and talk, I listen to how they communicate, and I ask you a lot of questions about what they do at home, in each language. You're the expert on that. I'm also not going to judge your child's talking by English alone.⁵

I don't offer therapy in your home language. What I can do is use what you tell me about it, and help you support your child at home in the language you use with them. The assessment guide explains the session step by step.

What about nursery and school?

Starting nursery or school is often when a child's English takes off, and when worries show up, because suddenly someone is comparing. A child who hasn't said much in English for a few weeks isn't necessarily struggling. But if they're also very quiet at home, or you're hearing the same concern from staff term after term, that's the time to ask for a proper look, not another round of waiting.

It helps if staff know which languages your child hears and uses. A practical thing to ask the setting is how they learn about children's home languages and use them in the day. Some children who talk freely at home and stay silent in the classroom have selective mutism, which is a different thing from learning a new language.⁶ I'd be glad to talk it through.

What can I do at home with two languages?

Pretty much the same things as any family, in the language you're most comfortable in. Talk about what your child is doing, leave pauses, read and tell stories, sing the songs you grew up with. Use each language in the situations where it comes naturally. There isn't a magic rule such as "one parent, one language", and you don't need to follow one if it doesn't suit your household.

Nursery and school can help by learning a few key words in your child's home language and by letting them use it. For settings, I can visit and talk this through with staff; see schools and nurseries.

If you're worried and would like someone to look properly, my language and communication support is where most children with talking difficulties start. Prices are on the fees page, and you can always begin with the free call.